Yes Indeedy

And Then
Just when I thought I was done
I learned I was not
Years more of walking and waking
Working towards love
Loving towards home
Awaiting an embrace
That can not come
I have these struggles
They fuel the heart, I know I know
And just when I thought
They would be no more
Subside into substance and sustainance and freedom
I learn they are the embrace
They are the beauty
Melancholy and whistful and ugly as my most foul version of me

There is discomfort
Itching with anxiety
Eyes tracking left to right to left
Or is it right to left to right
Let's let go, yeah?
Let's let go and live this
This beauty, hideous and filthy
Is all mine
I will shout it out
Naked and raw
Terrain just awaiting navigation
I embrace love, trite and ignorant and sappy and all
And I am proud of
Did you hear?
I said proud of
Even that ugliest and most foul version of me